A list of listy lists. And the PCC Debacle is far from resolved.

First things first: The email address given on the SAPS website for police clearance certificate queries is WRONG.

The correct address is crcnameclearance@saps.gov.za. Yes, I'm publishing it. No, I don't care if they get spammed. They publish it on their website, or, at least, they think they do. This address is the correct one. Use this one, unlike a certain red-penned moron who emailed them weeks ago to ask them to change the method of dispatch so my friendly but expensive document assistance lady could pick it up and get it apostilled. Basically, I paid R500 for her to:

1. Check on my PCC and speed up the process.
2. Pick it up.
3. Get it apostilled.
4. Send it on to my recruiter. 

But of course, our wonderful civil services have thwarted my attempt to save time and money by spending money:

1. Nationwide delivery strikes led to my PCC getting lost in the mail.
2. When they did eventually find it, weeks later, the backlog from the strikes meant that my PCC took longer to appear on the database than it should have,
3. Their website provides the wrong contact information, so weeks after I emailed this wrong address about wanting them to NOT POST IT, but rather give it to my document lady, I still had not received even the slightest acknowledgment of receipt. My documents lady gave me the correct email address, which I have reposted above. But I was too late...
4. After I emailed the correct address, I received an email from them saying that I had just missed it; the processed PCC was posted to me this morning.

So, who's willing to bet this will a) get stolen, b) go missing, c) spontaneously combust?

While it isn't my document lady's fault, considering that the Civil Services have successfully thwarted any chance she might have had of doing anything remotely useful (not for want of trying), I am trying to see if I can be refunded at least some of the money.

And I'm trying not to cry, and trying not to murder someome.

But you know me - I'm an optimist. So, final list in this rather listy post:

1. At least it's been processed.
2.  At least it's on its way.
3. At least my house isn't flooded.
4. At least I'm not living in a bathroom (true story, it happened, maybe I'll mention it someday - probably in the same breath as 'WOW this Korean apartment is TINY' or something. Stay tuned for that).
5. At least I'm alive.
6. At least the internet is working (albeit intermittently).
7. At least my interview has been scheduled!!!!!

The Great PCC Debacle of 2012

Crikey, what a mission. I suppose it serves me right for ignoring warnings and leaving it so late to apply for my Police Clearance Certificate, the very last document that I need. Well, in early September, I went to get fingerprinted. R59 and some very dirty hands later, I was ready to send it on to be processed at the Criminal Records Centre in Pretoria.

Mistake number 1: I didn't send it immediately; I was waiting until the new EPIK application form came out so I could do all my posting at once. Get this sorted out ASAP.

So eventually I speed-serviced it over to Pretoria. Getting a tracking number reassured me, as this one envelope contains everything an identity thief could ever dream of. I sent it off the day after my EPIK stuff was sent to my recruiter for the simple reason that I'd forgotten to bring it with me on my first visit to the post office.

Mistake number 2: Wrapped in the bubble of news-silence that is Grahamstown, I was unaware that there was looming strike action. And, whaddaya know? The very week I send my most important document off, the delivery truck drivers go on strike. Story of my life. The post office outsourced to private drivers. However, this inevitably led to chaos as these guys really are not trained to do post. For example, one guy gave the entire bag of post - parcels, snail mail and speed services - to the nearest human being, a security guard, when he arrived before the post office opened. Luckily that security guard was an honest person, and he brought it into the post office branch where my flatmate works (which is why I know this happened).

As a result of this fiasco, my PCC went missing. And I only discovered this when Noma, the nice lady at Docs4Expats who I'd paid to speed things up and to monitor it, emailed me to tell me that it hadn't arrived. Even though I'd sent it over a week before that.

I spent an entire day phoning the post office and police station (and intermittently crying in between) trying to find my missing documents, and Noma suggested I get re-fingerprinted and send them via courier as soon as possible. The wonderful lady at the Post Office went out of her way to track my parcel down, and finally managed to confirm that it had been delivered to the CRC in Pretoria. When the young cop on the phone at the CRC told me about how they were barely dealing with the backlog, and sounded like she was going to cry from being shouted at by an entire country all day, I decided to give it a week. I also didn't want to go back to the dodgiest part of town to get fingerprinted. Again.

So I waited, and waited, and waited. The strike ended and Noma said she'd see if she could pick up the documents from the post office. And that was the last I heard about it - which is understandable as nearly every person and their aunt is using Noma to get things apostilled and so on in Pretoria this time of year, so she is beyond busy.

On Friday I asked my nice boyfriend if he could give me a lift to the police station to get re-fingerprinted this Monday, as rain has been putting me off the walk. Well, it has not stopped raining since Wednesday. And not the usual half-hearted drizzle; this is 5 days of solid torrential downpour, 24/7 (except for a brief sunny respite which coincided with our usual Ultimate Frisbee practice time, luckily enough). Nearby towns are flooded, and a couple of hours ago the only road to the nearest city was washed away by a flooded river.

Here are some photos of the devastation in Grahamstown:

The main road to Port Elizabeth

So... if I did try to post anything, it would go via Port Elizabeth. But only if the van is driven by Sandra Bullock.

In a fit of optimism I decided to see if anything had progressed on Pretoria's end, by checking the status of my application here.

And lo and behold, my PCC application has appeared on their database, which means it is being processed. Additionally, the other day my original copy of my TEFL certificate arrived in Mauritius, so I'm just that much closer to being in Korea. My recruiter says I'm on the waiting list for an interview, so I should hear about that any day now.

In the end, after all this chaos, things are looking up. Well, except for the destruction of the main supply lines to town. Farms have lost their crops because of flooding, and anything they did manage to harvest is stuck on the other side of impassable roads, so (of course) Pick n Pay have doubled their prices and it looks like I'll have to start rationing the cookies. Students have been seen bum-surfing on local schools' fields, some businesses are closed, and it is quite likely that no one will show up to class on Monday, as students in this town are known to dissolve if they get wet. Something to do with the alcohol content in their blood streams.

Time to break out the rubber duckie.

Korean Ultimate Players Association

Looking at the title of this post, you may think I am going to write about dating practices, cheating, and people who look like this weirdo:

ye standarde tinfoil pimpe cup.

No, no, silly people. I'm going to talk to you about sports. Or not. Maybe I'll just post a video of what I found today that makes me ridiculously happy. It's a way to stay fit AND make friends and, well, I'm not very good at it but if this weather ever lets up and we get to have more games, I'll improve.

And now, our feature presentation, courtesy of KUPA:

Watch the bonus footage at the end to see an incredibly cute demonstration of bringing your interests into your school, and lessons.

They have teams all over Korea! I've never played in a competitive team before, aside from a few months of hockey in high school. So exciting! And Ultimate Frisbee is ridiculously fun. 

I think this is another thing to look forward to in Korea. :D

What to Bring to South Korea

My old friend Grant asked, "Where exactly in Korea are you based? And what should I bring with me? I'm still waiting to hear, but I'm hoping to get to Seoul."

Well, firstly I'm also still waiting for my interview, but I've got my fingers crossed for Daegu. As for what to bring...

The official EPIK website has a pretty detailed list of what you'll need to have when you're in Korea, but I've found options that make it easier for you to pack. The EPIK list is here, outlining the basics. And somehow you need to fit it into a 20kg bag.

Some tips and tricks I've picked up from reading other blogs:

Pack for half the year, not the whole year. 
If you're arriving in Fall, then pack winter clothes (you can get an idea of what the weather is like at whatever time of the year by going to your city's Wikipedia page). Limit the bulky items; the key to staying warm in Korea is layering, and they're also better equipped for cold there, so you can buy the bulky stuff there, if you are not a 6ft giant. Be ruthless; your school has to provide you with a washing machine and there is indoor space for you to hang things up in your apartment, so just accept that you'll need to do laundry often at first. Pack up the clothes you won't need for 6 months and get someone generous to post that package to you once you know your address.

Pack things you know you can't get in Korea.
It's really hard to get shoes if your feet are a Saffer size 6 and above, although some shops and markets in Seoul are becoming more sasquatch-friendly. And you can order shoes online from other countries and have them delivered. But when you arrive there, make sure you've got shoes that are worn with socks and come off easily for various occasions. Koreans are not so hot on bare feet, and you need to take your shoes off when entering a home. Also pack a decent pair of hiking boots. Again, you can leave half your shoes at home, to be posted later - if you're arriving in February, you don't need to pack your wellies as the monsoon season only starts in August-ish. But make sure you have some kind of boot to traipse through puddles in.

As I mentioned previously, other things like underwear also might be hard to find in your size if you don't have a particularly Asian build, so stock up on that.

Koreans don't sweat nearly as much as Westerners, for some reason. As such, it's almost impossible to get deodorant unless you pay an arm and a leg on the black market. Bring as much as you can fit in your bag, keeping in mind that summer in Korea is very humid.

The cold - there's a weird weather system that means that in Korea, in winter, the wind blows frostbite at you from Siberia. No, really, SIBERIA. South Africa doesn't ever get that cold, so you might need to visit Cape Union Mart and get a Ski jacket. Even then, it probably won't be warm enough, so accept that you're going to look like an obese jersey-addict for a bit until you get a proper warm Korean jacket.

You start work pretty much immediately after orientation, so make sure you've got some decent teacher clothes as well. Suit up, boys and girls, and ladies - hide the girls. Koreans don't mind if your skirt is so short you can see your armpits, but your shoulders must be covered and your twins stowed neatly out of sight.

Settling into your apartment - I've seen a lot of blogs suggesting that you bring bedding, as it is difficult to buy it in Korea. Wellll... I suppose so. But I am personally going to save space by ordering the basics from The Arrival Store. They're cheap, they deliver to your door and they're awesome, according to people who've used them. I'm not sure how long you'd need to wait for them to deliver it, after you arrive, but every apartment has underfloor heating, so if you bring a blankie or something you can probably 'camp' on your floor until your TAS box arrives - probably only a night or two. Hey, it's an adventure. It will be fun. Maybe.

Unnecessary items:
Don't bring your phone unless it's a recent smartphone, such as one running Android, Windows OS or an iPhone. Ordinary phones don't work in Korea, and you can easily get one when you arrive. If you bring a smartphone, you probably won't be able to use it at first because those require contracts, which no one is going to give a GET in their first six months, as a lot of GETs get homesick or fed up or disillusioned and leave.

You can buy most shampoos and conditioners in Korea, and their make-up is about 500 years ahead of the rest of the world, so bring some basics but indulge in the wonders of BB cream and eyeliner compasses when you arrive.

Bring a couple of pairs of nice socks with you - soft, clean, new-looking and not raggedy and full of holes, but know that you can buy them by the bucket load when you arrive as well. So, bring a couple for the first month or so, and then go shopping with your first paycheck (2.1 mill) + entrance allowance (1.3 mill) + settling in allowance (300 000) +... How awesome is it that we'll be millionaires in a month? Ah, ok, millionaires in Kwon isn't quite the same, but hey, I like seeing multiple zeroes in my bank account. Provided there's something in front of those zeroes. I digress. You only get this at the end of your first month (except for the settling in allowance) so bring some cash with you to tide you over for a month.

Quell homesickness
If there is a particular item from home that you love and cherish and makes you feel happy, bring it. Your first couple of months in Korea can be pretty lonely. I'll be bringing a massive stack of fake polaroids of some very happy times and the teddy bear I've had since I was a baby. But the best way to deal with homesickness, and I know this as someone who's lived away from home since I was 14 years old, is to

a) pretend you've slipped through a portal into a parallel universe. I'm nerdy like that, but if you treat it like you're hopping in the TARDIS for a bit and can pick up right where you left off, you may be horribly mistaken but it will feel a lot easier than if you think you're abandoning your home, your country and all the people you love.
b) learn to use and love Skype. You'll have internet set up in your apartment pretty soon, and until then there are lots of wifi hotspots, so you can keep in touch with the fan-damily if you feel the need.
c) keep busy. Learn Korean. Explore your city. Make amazing lessons for your students. Don't just sit in your apartment, wallowing in self-pity and loneliness. If you made friends during Orientation, meet up with them. They're probably feeling as lost and as lonely as you are.

So bring stuff that lets you do that. You can buy books on learning Korean when you get there. Save weight by bringing a Kindle - it can hold thousands of books and it will love you forever and you can cuddle it and snuggle it and try not to fall asleep holding it above your face because it is harder than a paper book and it will hurt you. Ow.

That's all I can think of right now - but remember I haven't listed everything, just the personal tweaks I'll be making if I make it through the interview stage. Use the EPIK list as your foundation, but know it's a little bit flexible depending on how willing you are to adapt to your new environment.